Welcome Back Brew Nation!! Thanksgiving is just a week away. I hope that you get to enjoy time doing things you love with people you enjoy!! The big question is… Is it ‘stuffing’ or ‘dressing’? Drop me a note [email protected] and keep me straight!
Here is your weekly pour of the Champions Brew – An assembly of things I have been reading, watching, or listening to that you will likely find valuable. I hope that this equips you to be a more uncommon leader this week!
- What I have been reading: A recent excerpt from the Uncommon Life Daily Devotional (a part of my morning routine is readying from this or a couple other ‘daily’ readers that I have)by Tony Dungy really challenged me. I wanted to share it. I know it will challenge you as well:
Speak the truth in love. We often hear that “the truth hurts.” But, we have to understand that the truth – when spoken in love – HELPS! With our children, friends, co-workers, etc. Many people have an inability to speak truthfully – in a loving way or frankly, in ANY way. We see in particular with supervisory (leadership) positions; they don’t want to write negative evaluations of someone even if that individual’s performance is subpar. And so that person who thinks he or she is doing a good job stay sin that position, and the mission of the business or ministry suffers. We do a great disservice to people who need to hear an honest critique.
Then, Tony REALLY brings down the hammer:
Here’s what I believe is the crux of the matter. The supervisor(aka common leader) doesn’t really believe that the employee is created by God as a unique and special human being! If the boss DID believe that, he or she would quickly see that there are two options: help the employee apply his or her gifts to the task by building on strengths and minimizing weaknesses OR find the person a different position more suited to his or her gifts.
Whew… Jim Collins in Good To Great would talk about it as making sure people are on the right seat on the bus. John Maxwell might say, “Change the leader… or change the leader.” I say that this is something I really struggled with early on in my career. I don’t know if I didn’t value that person, but I truly was averse to tough feedback. I didn’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings.
So, how can you be better at ‘Speaking the truth in love.’ – There is a process I have learned to adapt and coach over the years that has been very effective for me. It’s 4 letters S-B-I-A:
- Situation – focus on the situation, NOT the person.
- Behavior – What are the actions or inaction (which is actually a behavior as well!) that YOU have observed that need to be addressed
- Impact – What is the Impact on You as a leader? What is the Impact on the team if there has been an impact? And, what is the Impact on the person? His behaviors are not aligned with the expecations and there is a need to change, which leads to #4
- Action – What Actions will the person you are giving the feedback to commit to doing to change? What Actions are you as the leader, friend, or family member willing to do to help with the situation as well? Work to come to agreement on those actions and then set a date to follow-up and do just that… follow up!!
Speaking the truth in love is simple, not easy. Being an Uncommon leader is one who is able to speak the truth in love so that the potential of the individual and the relationship can be maximized.
- A Quote I found challenging: “The longer you hold a grudge, the longer the grudge has a hold on you.” – Jeff Henderson – Buckhead Church
What you need to do:
Call to Action: What situation do you need to speak the truth in love? Script out the conversation you want to have using the S-B-I-A framework. If you know it will be a tough conversation, pray about it beforehand and ask for understanding from both sides. Tell yourself that NOT having the conversation is not a good option.
I hope you enjoyed this week’s edition of Champions Brew. If you enjoyed it, I would appreciate it if you would share it with a friend who might enjoy it as well and ask them to subscribe! I will make sure they automatically get this email every week.
Also, the Uncommon Leader podcast is growing! Click HERE for a list of the episodes of interviews I have done with Uncommon leaders. It has been enjoyable for me and I know the guests will add value to you as well !
Until next time, go and Grow Champions!