“We must begin thinking like a river if we are to leave a legacy of beauty and life for future generations.” ― David Brower
Happy Friday, Brew Nation!
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The scent of lilies hung heavy in the air, a poignant contrast to the shared laughter echoing through the funeral home. My father, a man who’d lived a full 80 years, passed away this month. And as I stood to deliver his eulogy, I wasn’t alone. My brother, friends, and family joined in, painting a portrait of a life that was very impactful. Tears flowed, memories were shared, and we celebrated the man he was.
Then came the unexpected treasure: a glimpse into our family’s past. Hundreds of photos, naturalization papers, old report cards, and memorial guest books from generations past – a fascinating journey through the family tree of the Gallagher’s. It was a stark reminder: our lives leave a trail, a story that continues long after we’re gone.
Within days of my father’s passing, the weight and awareness of mortality increased. News of a friend, close to my age, taken abruptly after a family walk. A client’s teenage son, lost in a tragic automobile accident.
And then, this past week I attended the Heritage Forum with a group of 25 other leaders. It was a timely opportunity to craft my “Heritage Vision” – a future picture of the impact we leave on those around us. I don’t think the timing of this event was accidental.
One of the speakers at the Heritage Forum shared an impactful video from Michael Jr., the comedian, who hit the nail on the head when he said, “when you know your why your what seems more impactful because you’re walking in purpose.” John Maxwell echoes this, “Our lives are going to be summed up in one or two sentences. We might as well write it ourselves.”
And that’s exactly what the Heritage Forum challenged us to do: author a story about why we do what we do and what we want those closest to us to say about us when are not around any longer. This was a challenging few days and it has, frankly, been a challenging few weeks. Crafting your legacy story is not an exercise that you just decide one day to complete on our own and I think there are many reasons:
- Discomfort: Confronting our mortality is never easy. And it will rarely get to the top of the priority list if you try to fit it in during a ‘normal’ week of work. It takes dedicated, focused time to give it the honor it deserves.
- Lack of Know-How: We simply don’t know where to start.
- Denial: “It won’t happen to me.” If we all knew what day we were not going to be around any longer, the urgency would be higher.
- Fear of Alarming Others: We worry about upsetting our loved ones. Be aware of the impact of discussing your legacy/what others will say about you at your funeral without the context of proactively creating what you want said in the future!
But here’s the truth: intentionality changes everything.
So, what are some steps we can take to start being more intentional at building those relationships? I have listed a few below:
- Invest in Your “First Two Rows”: Another speaker shared that those closest to you, the ones who will speak your name at your farewell, are generally sitting in the first two rows at the funeral home. This was true for my father’s celebration. Be intentional in your relationships with them.
- Discover Your “Why”: Beyond your “what,” understand the driving force behind your actions. As Michael Jr. says, it’s about walking in purpose. This little excerpt from Michael Jr is worth the 4 minutes to watch. I put a link to the video at the end of the post.
- Write Your Eulogy: This isn’t morbid; it’s empowering. It’s about defining your narrative.
- Develop a Family Vision & Purpose: Ensure your values and impact extend beyond your lifetime for generations to come. Sit down with your family and craft his out. It is an action step that I left the Heritage Forum inspired to complete.
- Embrace Wisdom & God’s Plan: Psalm 90:12 reminds us to “Teach us to number our days so that we may gain a heart of wisdom.” Proverbs 16:9 reminds us that while we plan, God establishes our steps.
This post isn’t intended to be a somber reflection; it’s a celebration. We can transform our relationships by being intentional about the legacy we leave.
My dad’s 80 years were filled with impact. But did he consciously shape his narrative? Not really. I know that I will be sitting down with my family to discuss what I want my story and our story to be. I hope that day is far off, as I strive to reach my own goal of a 90+ year health span. But as we all know, “father time is undefeated.”
CLICK HERE to watch the Michael Jr video I reference above.
Being successful as a leader requires intentional leadership habits. That’s why I developed the Ideal Week template – a tool that helps me identify disciplines and habits needed for success and allocate the necessary time. It guides you through planning your ideal week, ensuring you dedicate time to the activities that bring you closer to your goals.
Want to give it a try? Email me at [email protected] with the words ‘IDEAL WEEK’ in the subject line and I’ll send you a copy of the Ideal Week template complete with a sample to get you started!
- Quote of the week:
“And he shall be like a tree planted by the rivers of water, that bringeth forth his fruit in his season; his leaf also shall not wither; and whatsoever he does shall prosper.” – Proverbs 11:28
What You Need to Do:
Call to Action: Brew Nation, what story are you writing? What will your first two rows say? Don’t wait for the final curtain. Start crafting your legacy today. Write your eulogy, define your “why,” and build a vision that transcends your lifetime. Your intentionality will resonate for generations. Go plan.
It’s an honor to be your trusted “Friday Coffee Guy”. Each week, I’m excited to provide yet another round of curated content that I’ve been reading, listening to, watching, or thinking over. The purpose of the Champions Brew is to inspire, equip and encourage you to become the uncommon leader you were designed to be. I am so grateful for your decision to invest a few moments with me! I hope you enjoyed this week’s edition of Champions Brew. If you did, I would appreciate it if you would share it with someone who might enjoy it as well and ask them to subscribe! I will make sure they automatically get this email every week.
Until next time, Go and Grow Champions!
P.S. – Are you a podcast fan? Maybe the Uncommon Leader podcast is for you. Are you interested in being a guest on the Uncommon Leader Podcast? Do you have a story to tell? Email me [email protected] and let’s have a chat and set something up!!
