“Bravery isn’t built alone. It’s strengthened through a continuous loop where mindset drives action, action builds confidence, and relationships create the support system that keeps us pushing forward.” — Jill Schulman, author of The Bravery Effect
Happy Friday, Brew Nation!
I was reading something powerful this week, and it hit me with the force of a cold, high-altitude wind. It’s the kind of truth you need to hear, especially as a leader trying to do uncommon work.
The core idea, coming from Dr. Jill Schulman’s book, The Bravery Effect, is this: People rarely fall short because they lack talent or potential. They fall short because they convince themselves that “good enough” is, well, good enough.
Don’t settle for good enough.
We have come to confuse comfort with happiness. As a result, we’ve spent our entire lives trying to remove all the discomfort. But the uncomfortable truth is that almost everything you really want in life, INCLUDING happiness and your deepest potential, requires growth. And growth is often on the other side of something hard to do.
This concept showed up for me as recently as this week.
The View from the Edge
I decided to go on a hike with my son near Boulder, Colorado. My son has become a natural climber, a fearless adventurer, and I knew he was going to challenge me just by being himself. He wasn’t always that way. He has also benefited from the bravery effect.
We had followed a winding, difficult trail until we reached the final push—a peak that required climbing out onto a narrow rock ledge that looked over a very steep drop. For those who know me, one of my greatest fears is heights.
My son scaled the rock effortlessly. He turned, saw the hesitation in my body, and—in an act of both grace and permission—offered, “Dad, you can just pause here. You’ve made it this far.”
That’s the moment we all face, isn’t it? The chance to settle for “good enough.” The comfortable vantage point is right there, safe and solid.
But I knew something deeper. I knew if I wanted to appreciate the incredible, 360-degree view he was talking about, I was going to have to choose the discomfort. I had to practice what I preach.
I chose the climb. Knees shaking, heart pounding, I scaled that last stretch. And when I reached the top, the view was breathtaking. I felt the profound, quiet joy of overcoming a self-imposed barrier. I was glad I did it. (For the record, I climbed back down pretty quickly!)
The principle is inescapable: “The challenge of wind makes a tree grow stronger.” When trees are exposed to the wind, they develop deeper root systems that help them survive tough challenges. As long as you avoid hard things, you’ll remain in the comfort trap, and your roots—your character, your resilience, your potential—will remain shallow.
The Invisible Barriers to Bravery
If we know this, why do we stay stuck? Why do we choose comfort?
Barrier 1: The Isolation Trap.
We often surround ourselves with people who confirm our current state—people who won’t challenge us, who enable our comfort. It takes bravery to seek out relationships that will actually make us better.
I loved this quote from the philosopher Seneca:
“Associate with those who will make a better man of you. Welcome those whom you yourself can improve. The process is mutual; for men learn while they teach.”
The comfort trap happens when we choose to isolate. Bravery requires connection, and sometimes, the most brave thing you can do is admit you need help.
Dr. Schulman offers a simple framework for breaking this isolation:
- What is the obstacle holding you back right now?
- Who are three people who can help?
- Why aren’t you connecting with them?
As a man of faith, I take my challenges to God in prayer(maybe not as frequently as I want, but I am training myself to do this!), trusting the scripture that says: “Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you” (1 Peter 5:7).” But there are always at least two others God has placed in your life to challenge and lift you up. We have to have the courage to challenge others, too. As the Bible says, “Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another” (Proverbs 27:17). “
Barrier 2: The Myth of Fearlessness.
Let me be clear: Bravery is not about being fearless. It is the choice to act despite fear toward a meaningful goal. It’s how we free ourselves from fear, self-limiting thoughts, and regret. “Being brave is the ultimate expression of freedom. It’s how we free ourselves from fear.”
Bravery requires a certain level of stress—too little leads to complacency, and too much leads to overwhelm. That sweet spot is where growth happens.
Your 4 Pillars of Bravery
To step into a brave life, the author outlines 4 foundational principles that exist to improve your bravery:
- Almost everything you want is on the other side of something hard. “Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.” (Galatians 6:9)
- Bravery begins with how you think. “Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.” (Philippians 4:8)
- Brave action turns potential into reality. “Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me—put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you.” (Philippians 4:9)
- Seek out those who challenge you and call forth your best. “Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another.” (Proverbs 27:17)
The life you want is waiting for you on the other side of the rock you’ve been avoiding. Don’t settle for the comfortable view.
- Quote of the Week
“You can’t build muscle in a hammock” — Jill Schulman, author of The Bravery Effect
Being brave is the ultimate expression of freedom. It’s how we free ourselves from fear. Notice, this doesn’t say that we will no longer have fear; it frees us from self-limiting thoughts and regret. It’s how we accomplish things we are proud of (like climbing up on that rock!).
Bravery is not about being fearless; it is the CHOICE to act despite fear toward a meaningful goal. This choice requires a level of productive stress: too little leads to complacency, and too much leads to overwhelm. The Uncommon Leader intentionally seeks the kind of stress that forces growth.
Ultimately, being effective as a leader means consistently choosing discipline over distraction. It’s about deeply reflecting on what’s working, humbly learning from what hasn’t, and courageously course-correcting in relentless pursuit of uncommon growth. Leaders don’t just drift into success—they evaluate, decide, and act.
What’s a leadership lesson you’ve learned in an unexpected place—a moment where you chose bravery, or where discomfort led to a breakthrough?
Email me at coachjohngallagher@gmail.com with the subject line “BRAVERY” and share your story. Your email will be entered into a DRAW for a FREE BRAVERY BOOK. I will also respond by sending you a FREE CALL schedule form so we can discuss the ultimate purpose behind your leadership journey. I’m excited to read all your messages!
What you need to do:
Your Call to Action: Be Brave Today!
You’ve got the time. You’ve got the tools. Now it’s time to make the choice.
I want to personally equip you to make that brave leap.
Action: Send me a note with the subject line BRAVERY and I will enter your name in a drawing to get a free copy of The Bravery Effect.
P.S. Want to hear more about how to live life beyond your comfort zone? Listen to my conversation with Dr. Jill Schulman: [The Bravery Effect: Harnessing Discomfort to Unlock Your True Leadership Potential] and hear how she convinces me to be brave and run a Spartan 5K in Fenway Park in November!. Want to share your story of courage and grace on The Uncommon Leader Podcast? Email me and let’s connect!
It’s an honor to be your trusted Friday Coffee Guy. Each week, I bring what I’m learning and living in the trenches of leadership. If this edition challenged or encouraged you, share it with someone who leads, stays faithful, or learns alongside you, then click subscribe. Let’s grow Brew Nation together!
Until next time—stay focused, stay faithful, and keep growing, Champions! 💪
